Posts Tagged ‘old age’

Living Forever

Posted: January 11, 2022 in Poetry
Tags: , , ,
Living Forever
By David Allen

I'm going to live forever.
All I have to do is never
take out the trash.
a
Sound Weird?
Well, I have it on good authority.
One drunken night in New Orleans,
lost and staggering through
forgotten alleyways,
my friend and I came upon
a palm reader who charged
two bucks to tell my future.

“Well, here’s two bucks for you and…”
“Five for the room?” she asked, smirking.
I was stunned. “How did you know that 
was a line in one of my poems?”
“I’m a seer,” she said. “Give me a hand.”
She slowly traced the lines in my palm.
“You’ll live to the ripe old age of 91,” she said.
Really? Wow, I thought. I had seven more decades 
of rollicking, wild fun ahead of me.

She released my hand and I gave her a tip.
As I turned to leave and find a bar to celebrate,
I heard her wildly cackling behind me.
“It's then you’ll trip and hit your head
on concrete stairs while taking out the trash!” 

Well, the Grim Reaper will have to wait.
I swore right then to never take out the trash.

That was decades ago.
Now, excuse me, a film crew
from a television show
about hoarding is coming over.

Old Age

Posted: October 12, 2019 in Poetry
Tags: , , , ,

pd43-0604-191-jj.jpg
(Stock Image)

OLD AGE
By David Allen

Bent posture
Grouchy nature
Prescription pill bottles
Wild walking waddles.

Memory lapses
Cheap reading glasses
Hair shedding
Tummy spreading.

Cane walking
Unsteady talking
Teeth in a glass
Passing much gas.

Spinal hardware
Keys are not there
Midnight pee calls
Numbing pratfalls.

Artery stents
Obscene vents
Diner discounts
Joint bank accounts.

Skin splotches
Year’s end notches
TV bingeing
X-ray cringing.

Children have grown
Remortgaged home
Much makes me enraged
This must be old age.